# Dog and cat. - I had to share...



## alvin (May 10, 2006)

A dog's diary: 

7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite! 
8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite! 
9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite! 
Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite! 
2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite! 
3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite! 
4 pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite! 
6 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mom! My favorite! 
7 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favorite! 
8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite! 
9 pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favorite! 
11 pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my people's bed! My favorite! 

A Cat's Diary 
Day 183 of my captivity. 

My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from clawing the furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant. 

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded. Maybe I should try this at the top of the stairs. 

In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair. I must try this on their bed. 

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little kitty cat I was. This is not working according to plan. 

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More important, I overheard that my confinement was due to my powers of inducing something called "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. 

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant. He speaks with them regularly, and I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait. 

It's only a matter of time...............


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## mr squeaks (Apr 14, 2005)

Have seen this before and find it just as hysterical this time around too!!

Of course, being the cat person that I am....ROFL

I bet Pete with Dorian von Nastypuss will LOVE it!

Thanks, Alvin!


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## Feefo (Feb 8, 2002)

I loved it!

Cynthia


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## Lin Hansen (Jan 9, 2004)

Alvin, thanks!

So funny and so true!

Linda


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